EYE-CATCHING!
–PREM: Bigo1 won. Even the alliteration inherent within has by now become stale, but still, props to Bigo1 for completely dominating a pretty competitive pack. For anyone not on a team called Bigo1, however, this is relegation hell. Seven points separate second from ninth. And SB Town in ninth, willfully flouting/ignoring the vagaries of the blank week 31, has the squad to rocket to the Champions League spots with a few favorable rolls of the dice. In tenth, GoFYS kills top-of-table teams on the regular, generally urging its opponents (and spectators) to go fuck themselves. Smash & Grab was reportedly elated to have risen to third, then admitted the elation was somewhat dampened by the neon-signed living nightmare that is living life one loss from the relegation zone.
-CHAMP: In a showdown between the top two, Brolin beat BayCobblers, erasing three points from the latter’s lead, now down to seven points. Difficult, but possible. All of which makes matters decidedly interesting. Meanwhile, in third v fourth, the Unicorns defeated the Banana Swans to remain third, just a point off second and 14 points ahead of BS. Elsewhere, All Star Gunners beat Branwellington in a high-scoring 55-44, Goleta defeated Sting and Ballers beat Boss Barkley by a crucial point. The shakeout sees All Star Gunners surge to fifth, level on points with Boss Barkley and Goleta. All three collectively breathe down the neck of Swans, just a point back. Sting trails the trio in eight, four points from safety. Branwellington, six; Cornballers a daunting 15. The difference between seventh and the last Champions League spot is one tiny point.
–LEAGUE 1: StillluvQPR beat top dog PSV, Tiger Tail beat Relic, MFF beat Yer Man, Chester beat Fourth Place and Wijnaldum beat an unlucky Sexpats 70-47, the tenth place team earning the third highest score of the week to no avail. It’s easier to just quote the numbers. Rankings look likely to swing wildly, week to week. In the promotion spots: PSV, 62; Wijnaldum, 61; and MFF, 60. Three points back in fourth, Relic on 57. Yer Man and Chester both have 53. QPR in seventh is the team with the target on its back. In the relegation zone, Tiger Tail trails QPR by 8; Fourth Place, 10; Sexpats, 16. Anyone’s title to take, yet. Stay tuned.
–LEAGUE 2: Route 57 defeated the Zoo, while Gloopy and DC LFC both won, sparking some rumors of a title race yet in the fourth division. Tralfamadore holds a seven point lead with seven matches to go. Yarbles sits in second, keeping pace in the hopes that the Zoo will drop more points while it manages the terrain four ahead of DC and 15 ahead of Route 57 in fourth. Tapped Up and Gadagnome beat Bony and Globes, respectively, boosting points totals at the bottom of the table. The Champions League spots begin to have a settled look about them, with 57 solidifying its spot after Mourinho-LO’s loss. LO needs only make up 4 points to retake the final CL berth.
Don’t forget to check out the Best-ish standings. It’s fun. And worth a cool $100.
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