EYE CATCHING!
–PREM: Sporting Wicker enjoys two points of breathing room atop Premier Mountain, from which its manager surveys the opulence and wonders of his kingdom with fulfillment. Any of teams second through fifth could catch up, however. Should the Wicker Man stumble, Chucky Pad or East Loop could even leapfrog to first next week, but Wicker hasn’t looked like losing. The bottom half of the table meanwhile limps along, not too far off the pace yet, but about as close to that point as it gets. It’s not true, folks, that tomorrow never comes.
–CHAMPIONSHIP: Granitza and the Unicorns top the table, but only six points separate first from seventh. Tight margins (tite). All Star Gunners had nominally traveled to Japan for a team building retreat–it was also reportedly red-flagged as a suspected Jim Jones-style mass hari kari event–but glorious winning ways returned again. Similarly, although Cornballers has first waiver pick locked down for the foreseeable future, the squad nearly pulled an upset against top-of-the-table Granitza, proving the squad is still up for the fight.
–LEAGUE 1: Relic and PSV both won, to keep the pace at its swiftest in the first two spots, Relic ahead by a point but both posting sizeable weekly numbers. Mighty Fine Feeling lost and Wijnaldum squeaked by with a 2 point victory over Sexpat but both remain stepping razors, just three points back. Meanwhile, Chester and stillluvQPR hover threateningly to capitalize on any dropped points, themselves just six points off the top.
–LEAGUE 2: Recently declared a three-horse race….it still sort of is. Except this week each of the top three lost. Holy shit. Widespread looting is believed to have ensued, such was the renewed hope and hysteria of the allegedly occasionally larcenous chasing pack. The league needed internal solutions to hook Zoo, DC and Gloopy back, and they still do, as the three sleekest equines continue to enjoy a decent lead. But mental states can often prove so fragile. Can the top dogs shake it off? Or will some enter the pitch next gameweek dazed as if fresh from 8 rounds of a chessboxing match, and then it’s fantasy football, possibly some actual horse riding involved–the metaphors kept mixing, it’s confusing. And how do you pull it together when it all falls apart like that? Inquiring minds continue to deeply crave this knowledge.
Don’t forget to check out the Best-ish standings. It’s fun. And worth a cool $100.
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